Monday, February 09, 2004

Paris Hilton's book proposal is on the web. It's about what you'd expect...and contains life-changing rules like:

Never drink Diet Coke. Diet Coke is for fat people. Only drink real Coca-Cola. Or Red Bull. Hate champagne because that's what everyone expects you to love. Red Bull is the best party drink. You never get tired.

Especially if you do two lines of coke with each Red Bull, dear.

It's pretty remarkable--I remember when Paris only belonged to Page Six and us, the masses of New York, and now she belongs to the world. And to tell the truth, this memoir is a kind of death, because Paris is at her best on Page Six--briefly mentioned, smiling an enigmatic smile with impossibly bright teeth, laughing. When you read this proposal it becomes blazingly clear what she's really like, and it isn't very pretty at all, as it spoils the illusion. There's rarely been a glamorous person who more needs to NEVER, EVER SPEAK.

Call me silly, but I find the whole thing heartbreaking.